When I was making work for this song- I was thinking about the idea of quiet. The moment you are alone – reflecting. There is a bit of agony in this song – the ‘I told you so” isnt always so great. You are right about something, but was it worth all the pain? Do you wish that all of this never happened.. even if it proved you were right all along.
… I didn’t know if you’d care if I came back
I have a lot of regrets about that– This is me Trying
This song to me has dual meanings. I have seen some speculation about Kanye and Kim – which, maybe, but I also think it’s a double meaning for the music industry, and scooter. After truths began to unfold, many many artists started to leave him, to the point of him retiring early, and saying it’s retirement, but most likely it was to save face so more artists didn’t cut ties from him publicly. Since this song references a lot of ‘I did something Bad’ I am thinking it’s more aligned with the music industry and this narrative, more so than the Kanye and Kim narrative. And to those wondering, ‘why wont she let it go?’ – because this hurt her a lot. Not only is she spending time recording all of her work, but also it has caused her a lot of distress, time, worry, money for a life long work and dream she has watched play out under someone else’s control.
I was in my new house placing daydreams
Patching up the crack along the wall
I pass it and lose track of what I’m saying
‘Cause that’s where I was when I got the call
This verse definitely paints a setting in my mind. However, this is also a metaphor as well. Just as a house with cracks in it, there are events in our life we have to patch up, heal, clean up. We have the ability to dissociate and forget all about it.. but then we are reminded and brought back to reality.
In a visual sense, you can picture someone investigating the cracks in the walls, the breaks in the foundation due to movement of the house over time. Breaks occur, it’s just something that happens as the earth shifts. We sometimes can ignore these spots, we can talk while we fix them, we can distract ourselves because it sometimes becomes routine to the fact we don’t have to focus on it any more, but a phone call comes in, and everything essentially blacks out, goes into tunnel vision.. we forget what we were doing before that call took place. In a grief sense, most of us can relate to this.
When the first stone’s thrown, there’s screaming
In the streets, there’s a raging riot
When it’s “Burn the bitch, ” they’re shrieking
When the truth comes out, it’s quiet
This song has so many visuals in my head when I hear it [I’m learning this is mostly because I am neuro-divergent lol] But I think about people running in the streets, throwing rocks at a window store front, a riot happens because there are people sticking up for something, while other things are being destroyed. When I first read these lines I feel like it’s fans fighting for her, but because of the end [and the I did something bad reference] it feels like actually – she was hurt and she threw essentially the first stone out of defense, which rises a ‘riot’ among media and celebrities against her, calling her the root of the problem, but as she is proven right — there is silence. No one says a word – and man I have felt those moments. The ‘I told you so’ but no one is brave enough to say they were wrong.
So, they killed Cassandra first ’cause she feared the worst
And tried to tell the town
A fun lil history Snippet!!! So this song she is aligning herself with Greek Mythology [when does she have time to read all of this shit] and this idea of warning people only to be blamed [kill the messenger].
The Cassandra metaphor (variously labeled the Cassandra “syndrome”, “complex”, “phenomenon”, “predicament”, “dilemma”, “curse”) relates to a person whose valid warnings or concerns are disbelieved by others. Painting of Cassandra by Evelyn De Morgan. The term originates in Greek mythology.
The idea of Cassandra was a ‘curse’ – just as we see in THE ALBATROSS. VEDANTAM: Cassandra has a blessing that is really a curse. She can see the future, but no one will believe her. But even if you set aside the curse, it turns out she also did several things that made it less likely she would be believed. For one thing, her prophecies were opaque
In this situation of songs, I’m gonna say what I said in I hate it here, I feel like we could have just received one of these songs. I feel like in both she is referencing her warning that was ignored. That she actually was referencing the same situation, being a warning, being a curse and not believed, only to be correct and not the one they should blame or fear. Over all I do like Cassandra more than the Albatross but both are referencing folktales or mythology in history that play the same situations.
So, they filled my cell with snakes, I regret to say
Do you believe me now?
Reputation that you? This is definitely attribute to reputation, and I did something bad. She took ownership of the snakes that Kim called her. And these are the lines that I think this song is a dual meaning for different warnings, but ironically happening all around the same time.
I think that’s why both of these situations are so prominent in Taylors memory and feelings- because they were all happening within the same time frame – and that can be very overcoming when you have put your life’s value on the approval of others and your fans.
I was in my tower weaving nightmares
Twisting all my smiles into snarls
They say, “What doesn’t kill you makes you aware”
What happens if it becomes who you are?
Stuck in a tower, waiting for someone to save her?
This makes me think about the folktale “Rumpelstiltskin” – “A poor miller’s daughter is able to spin straw into gold, and the king locks her in a room to test her. If she doesn’t succeed by morning, she will die.” Except she isn’t twisting something into gold, or something more valuable, she is turning beauty into anger and resentment.
Something that made her bitter – made her bitter. Turned her mind into a maze of continuous playback of the things she feared that became reality.
So, they killed Cassandra first ’cause she feared the worst
And tried to tell the town
So, they set my life in flames, I regret to say
Do you believe me now?
So Light me up, light me up, light me up.
They knew, they knew, they knew the whole time
That I was onto something
The family, the pure greed, the Christian chorus line
They all said nothing
From these lines I’m assuming she is discussing Scooters’ family, his home life, or this could be a generalization for what the industry portrays. People know who these producers are, they claim them to be good people, but they know the greed and the dysfunction that happens in the industry. It wasn’t surprising when Taylor said something, but they hoped it would die out. But when she proved everyone wrong – they kept their mouth shut.
Blood’s thick but nothing like a payroll
Bet they never spared a prayer for my soul
You can mark my words that I said it first
In a morning warning, no one heard
Family is thick love – but nothin’ as much as money is valued. I know that Scooters’ wife and Taylor had talked somewhere in all of the chaos. During the divorce? There ain’t nothing like a mad woman. As information comes out- truth unfolds, and people carry on like Taylor didn’t say a thing. If I remember right, as information came out slowly about scooter, the media didn’t really say anything about Taylor being accurate in her words or the story of her sold music. It was mostly the fans [us] that really made the connections.
I patched up the crack along the wall
I pass it and lose track of what I’m saying
‘Cause that’s where I was when I lost it all
Im assuming ‘lost it all’ was when she got the call about her discography being sold to Scooter.
Why is she not so mad or as mad at Scott? OR is she?
So, they killed Cassandra first ’cause she feared the worst
And tried to tell the town
So, they filled my cell with snakes, I regret to say
Do you believe me now?
Aah-aah
I was onto something
Aah-aah
They all said nothing
Blood’s thick but nothing like a payroll
Bet they never spared a prayer for my soul
You can mark my words that I said it first
In a morning warning, no one heard
No one heard
Not a single word was heard
When the first stone’s thrown, there’s screaming
In the streets, there’s a raging riot
When it’s “Burn the bitch, ” they’re shrieking
They’re burning all the witches, even if you aren’t one
They got their pitchforks and proof
Their receipts and reasonsI did something bad
When the truth comes out, it’s quiet
It’s so quiet
So quiet. Like the country roads on a foggy, rainy night.