Moments I’ll Remember, Memories You’ll Forget

An ongoing project about actively grieving and confronting the realities of dementia — inspired by Witt Lowry’s “The War I’m Scared to Face.”

In 2021, I began documenting my grandparents as a way to process an internal war: accepting my own aging, and with that, the aging — and inevitable loss — of those around me. My grandfather was diagnosed with dementia, and my grandmother lives with stage 4 heart disease. Their decline made the passage of time feel painfully real. Having already lost many young family members, I found their memories preserved within my grandparents’ home. But when my grandparents moved into a memory care facility, even those familiar spaces — so rich with memory — were lost.

This project began as a way to photograph what I was losing. I wanted to hold onto what was slipping away. But in doing so, I also discovered moments of unexpected joy within grief. Amid overwhelming sadness, there were flickers of light — smiles, laughter, and small moments of connection that carried profound weight.

Through photographing others in their own experiences of grief, I’ve come to realize that grief does not follow time. Whether it’s been two hours or twenty years since a loss, sorrow can reappear without warning. And still, even in spaces heavy with sadness, joy can emerge. We often feel guilty for laughing or smiling in these moments, but these emotional contradictions are deeply human. They remind us that love and loss exist hand in hand.

This body of work honors those small, fleeting joys — the quiet resilience that keeps us moving forward. In documenting these moments, I hope to reflect the full spectrum of grief: not just the pain, but the beauty, love, and humanity that live within it.

Images taken with 35mm film, 120mm film, and some DSLR/Mirrorless Nikon

Moments you’ll forget
digital image
The landscape that will become unfamiliar
Black and White Ilford Film 100
Double exposure
The landscape that will become unfamiliar
Black and White Ilford Film 100
Darkroom Print Original
The landscape that will become unfamiliar
Black and White Ilford Film 100
Double exposure with Darkroom Paper Negative
and Paper Positive
objects you thought were worth collecting
120mm iso 100
seats I’ve laughed in
120mm iso 100
forever yours
120mm iso 100
memories you kept
memories you’ll forget
120mm iso 100
hobbies and identities you’ll shed
120mm iso 100
portraits I’ll save
120mm iso 100
identities that are not mine, but yours
120mm iso 100
removed identity
120mm 100 ASA kodak
empty memos
digital image
Grams Domain
120mm 100 iso
Flower bulbs are what remains
120mm 100 iso
Trash You Cherished
120mm 100 iso
no return from here
400 ASA color film
your birthday
400 ASA color film
clean your plate
400 ASA color film
last moment
800 ASA color film
realization
800 ASA color film
childs mind around grief
800 ASA color film
realization
800 ASA color film
joy in moments of grief
800 ASA color film
last touches
400 asa ilford black and white
middle child
400 asa ilford black and white
my story
400 asa ilford black and white
moments of joy
400 asa ilford black and white
support
400 asa ilford black and white
the view of a child
moments of joy
400 asa ilford black and white
Not ready for this to be the last
Nov 2024 / Digital Image
Moments I feel your absence most
Nov 2024 / Digital Image
Pure Joy with JUJU
December 2024 / Kodak 400 ASA
these would have died with you
Feb 2025 / B&W Ilford 125
these would have died with you
Feb 2025 / B&W Ilford 125
my lineage
these would have died with you
Feb 2025 / B&W Ilford 125
Moments I’ll remember
digital image
The landscape that will become unfamiliar
Black and White Ilford Film 100
Solarized Print
The landscape that will become unfamiliar
Black and White Ilford Film 100
Paper Negative
fabric im woven into
120mm iso 100
where he told us we were his best friends
120mm iso 100
doors I’ll lose touch with
120mm iso 100
forbidden places
120mm iso 100
feminine 50’s collection
120mm iso 100
solo gatherings forevermore
120mm iso 100
the last time down these halls
120mm iso 100
objects you kept
120mm iso 100
seeds you’ve planted in the land and in our family
digital image
Names I’ll Never Know
120mm 100 iso
My Roots
double exposure
120mm 100 iso
The last portrait
120mm 100 iso
June 2024
Doors Closed
120mm 100 iso
i dont know
400 ASA color film
i exist with them
400 ASA color film
his birthday
400 ASA color film
1958
original image taken 11.22.58
merged in the darkroom with image from 2018
wait
800 ASA color film
jealous unawareness
800 ASA color film
‘you’re holding my boob’
800 ASA color film
honorable mention
400 asa ilford black and white
sight of a baby
400 asa ilford black and white
grandpa
400 asa ilford black and white
reunion in sadness
400 asa ilford black and white
moments of joy
400 asa ilford black and white
waiting
400 asa ilford black and white
you
found image / color film
Moments I feel your absence most
Nov 2024 / Digital Image
She couldn’t stay awake
December 2024 / Kodak 400 ASA
I miss your laughter the most
December 2024 / Kodak 400 ASA
he would have loved this
December 2024 / Kodak 400 ASA
these would have died with you
Feb 2025 / B&W Ilford 125
your boys
these would have died with you
Feb 2025 / B&W Ilford 125
in your ‘home’
these would have died with you
Feb 2025 / B&W Ilford 125
forevermore, i miss you
these would have died with you
Feb 2025 / B&W Ilford 125
The landscape that will become unfamiliar
Black and White Ilford Film 100
Double exposure with paper negative and paper positive
The landscape that will become unfamiliar
Black and White Ilford Film 100
Solarized Darkroom Print Original
things you cherished
120mm iso 100
Joy in Dispare
120mm 100 iso
hallways I’ve run down
120mm iso 100
objects I grew up spinning
120mm iso 100
past strange meals
120mm iso 100
Things you kept and we don’t know why
120mm asa 100
measurements we had to measure up to
120mm iso 100
breaking rules I had as a child
120mm iso 100
self portrait
inaccessible
120mm 100 iso
Ironic kept treasures
digital image
Is this the last one with you?
polaroid – april 30 2024
objects you kept
120mm iso 100
Underground Memories
120mm 100 iso
Trash I’ll Cherish
120mm 100 iso
here
400 ASA color film
forever in my memory
digital image 2015
his birthday
400 ASA color film
eatin with great grandpa and ma
400 ASA color film
goodbye
800 ASA color film
history
800 ASA color film
goodbye
800 ASA color film
the last
400 asa ilford black and white
one
400 asa ilford black and white
grandkids
400 asa ilford black and white
widow
400 asa ilford black and white
moments of joy
400 asa ilford black and white
moments of joy
400 asa ilford black and white
the landscape that becomes unfamiliar
100 asa ilford black and white
the past i didnt know
found image / color film
Moments I feel your absence most
Nov 2024 / Digital Image
I held her as she sobbed this day
Nov 2024 / Digital Image
Never know when it’s the last
December 2024 / Kodak 400 ASA
these would have died with you
Feb 2025 / B&W Ilford 125
these would have died with you
Feb 2025 / B&W Ilford 125
memorial
these would have died with you
Feb 2025 / B&W Ilford 125
35mm/ 100 ASA./ Austin, TX

In loss comes joy
This is as happy as it gets

Losing a life and grieving as they are alive
Makes you cherish the moments going by
Stopping and thinking this may be the last time
I hope they know how they are portrayed in my mind

You are the glue to my puzzle created life
Making all the family events feel glued together right
When pieces didn’t fit you created make shift objects to mold them tight
I’m scared to lose you but you made me take all these moments with stride

Losing young souls to time
Feeling uneasy about the passing of lives
Feeling joy for the moments I’ve had
Holding onto each breath like it’s my last

Getting older means facing hurt and grief
Getting older means laughing harder than the times in the past
Getting older means running the marathon even when you feel you can’t walk
But the moments of hope give momentum to to continue the drive

Hold on to the photos you wanted to burn
Because something in your mind told you that you shouldn’t be seen
Cherish the poor quality videos of your loved ones laughs
Store the words written on cards – trace them in ink – throw out your pencils
that give you the ability to erase
Good or bad these memories fade

Hold on to the photos you wanted to burn
Because something in your mind told you that you shouldn’t be seen
Cherish the grainy videos that recorded joy in times of grief
Save words written on cards – trace them in ink
Throw out the pencils that allow you to erase your mistakes